We have seen improvements. Big ones since my last post related to my first born and his spirited ways. Long term readers and those close to me know that I am nothing if not honest here and the night I wrote that I just HAD to let it all out. I thank you all for your love, understanding and suggestions. As I promised myself I would, I deleted the post after a few hours. I am glad so many of you found it a comfort to know you are not alone in the struggle with parenting a strong willed child. It helps me to know it too. Social media. It can be so very very good. Thank you friends for reminding me that above all Miles loves me dearly and I love him. That really is the whole point right?
The night of the post I midnight dialed a friend and just cried and cried to her. She, as she always is, was perfectly calming, understanding, uplifting. I honestly have no idea what I would do without her. I hung up the call knowing all would be well somehow, someday.
Since then I have seen small positive changes in my son. His "I love you's" came back. He started playing our "I Love You More Than..." game again. How I have missed that. He picks me flowers in the yard and on walks. He is hitting much less and he will stay in time out many of the times he's sent there without running away. He is trying and I am grateful.
We definitely continue to have our moments of willfulness defiance, battles, tantrums, and all of the other things I went on about in my post but right now we are moving in the right direction. I just have to keep up the energy to be what he needs me to be. And some days I am positive that I am not cut out for it. But Heavenly Father sent this beautiful boy to me. I was chosen to mother him. And I will not give up on him.
Thank you all again, so much for your advice, encouragement, and hands on help (you know who you are). I love you. Having family and friends as wonderful as you all makes everything seem much more possible.